Denial of Gold Medal Award- A Painful Lesson.

I dwelled in a kind of exhilarated and high-spirited mood when I started receiving mails and messages summoning me for the convocation as I was declared to be the overall Academic Topper of the four Horticultural colleges under Dr.Y.S.R.Horticultural University, Venkataramannagudem, West Godavari, and Andhra Pradesh. I was told that I will be awarded a Gold Medal in recognition by some of the Professors, though not officially during convocation scheduled on 27/03/15.

However, I was informed a couple of days ago that I am not eligible for the award according to the University norms and that the award will be given to the next highest scorer from another college. The reason for my ineligibility as they states is the presence of an Asterisk mark on my academic transcript. The origin of the mark has a tale to tell and a genuine justification from my side.

I along with my Bhutanese counterparts missed one exam entirely due to inconveniences and disruption in the college campus. Our exams got delayed owing to consistent strikes in the campus. We came to our home country for semester break on usual timing after the Professors and university officials having decided that they will conduct the exams at a later date. Accordingly, we booked our tickets for return journey as this has to be done months ahead in advance. But in between, we got a notice saying that our exam has been preponed.

A notice just 3 days before the rescheduled exam time wasn't enough to make the necessary arrangements to reach the college. We tried every possible way but to no avail. Indeed, it takes 2 days of journey for me and 3 days for my friends from Eastern Bhutan to reach the border town and an additional 2 days to reach the college. There is no way in which we can traverse a total journey of 5 days in a single day without a prior plan. That is how we missed an exam (Temperate Fruits), which we attended to in the following semester.

I know it hurts my conscience. I could sense tears brimming to my eyes. I slipped the grim chance of being awarded the Gold Medal. It disappointed me because I expected it. I expected because there were people from the university ushering me the hope. There were messages and mails that I will be getting a Gold Medal. But a single message a couple of days stung me hard. I slipped a moment where I can make my parents, relatives and country proud.

With tears rolling down my cheek, I let the words of my friends saying, ‘Please Tashi, aim for the Gold Medal’ fade in the distance. It was what I did actually had it not been for the dark patch that robbed me of the very right. I don’t know whether I deserved this but I don’t recall a day where I haven’t strive for a good performance and accordingly this medal. Though working hard and excelling in studies is for my own good, there isn't a time where I haven’t committed myself to maintaining a good social relation during my entire study period. I studied and worked to keep everything perfectly-knit.

In utter dismay, I wrote a letter to the University officials inscribed with all the justifications but without any response. I contacted the concerned official through call but the language and tone with which they denied only added salt to my wounded intellect.

Days passed and I let go off the idea of ever making it to the award. However, there were suggestions from my friends, relatives, seniors and even my own Professors that I should not skip this opportunity and fight for justice. Some said this is an injustice done to an international student. Others said that the reason for their denial is silly and unjust, & I shall appeal for intervention from higher authorities. Yet my only mom said, “That will be fine. You did well in your exam in Bhutan and got a job. Let the other take that medal. There are many who didn't get a job and are leading miserable lives. Be happy with all that you have now”. A remark from my beloved partner, “Don’t worry dear, we will get gold medal for loving each other” did provide a kind of solace.

I was really confused though, I took the next step in requesting for an intervention by the Department of Adult &Higher Education. I was immensely grateful for the kind of support and assistance they have rendered though the stand by the university was unmoved in which they stated;

 “According to the guideline, even though you got the highest overall grade point aggregate among the four Horticultural Colleges, you are not eligible for the said Gold Medal as you absented in the course FRSC-2.1.1. and passed subsequently in the next semester according to our records”.

I would reiterate that it wasn't a case in which I failed an exam or left any paper undone. There is something imprecise in the University record that states that I passed in the subsequent exam. This would imply if and only if I have failed in the previous exam. But after having provided all the justifications and genuine cause, there isn't a slight impact on their firmly-rooted decision. I know that no one can change a rule but there should be some provisions to it if it has to serve the purpose of equity and justice.

If I am to be deprived of such prestigious award simply on grounds of having missed an exam and then doing it the following semester, I wonder whether the award is a matter of time; not a matter of scores, which is the deciding factor in every institution elsewhere. If those in authority postpones and fixes dates for anything, be it exams or any important occasions haphazardly, is it not likely that someone will miss that?

If lapses on the side of the college or University should have such serious implication on the student, I guess the government of Bhutan or D.A.H.E. should give prior thought before sending meritorious students to such universities as it is likely that similar cases may ensue in the times to come.

If justice can’t be done in motivating the most deserving & meritorious student through such awards, there is no point in having perspired to reach the apex point of achievement. In fact, this would only demoralize dedicated students.

The reason for my ineligibility and the path leading me there have I inscribed here so that my fellow Bhutanese students do not tread the same path of deprivation that I have trod. It shall be a lesson that all learn from my painful tale.

Still, I feel that I am dwelling in the cocoon of that dampened spirit. I shall now shred open every strand of fiber and buoy up. I shall not be shattered. Neither shall I be deterred. Because from within, I haven’t lost the zest and vigor to soar higher.

The Scene at the Memorial Chhorten

The white magnificent stupa lay in the heart of the town, accessible by all. People clad in varying hue and designs of attire reach there to offer their prayers and wishes. People from all walks of life swarm in and congregate around it. Many queue into an array of lines along the slightly raised wooden planks for a sweaty yet hearty prostration.

The Memorial Stupa adorned in a myriad of hues...

Yet some come with a seemingly different purpose. Some youngsters gallop at the fastest pace with perspiration almost dripping from their faces. For them, the purpose is not what the wrinkle-clad and grey haired group of adults comes for. They simply want the extra-waistline to shed, their bellies to assume a desiring shape and showcase the opulence reflected in the way they dressed for this is one place where you will get a huge magnitude of spectators.

The Mani Dungkor remains crammed with grey-haired and watery eyed elderly ones. The rosary bound to their fingers would suffer an innumerable pull, the shiny and worn-out beads indicative of the number of times they were being pulled. Each of their faces would assume a transcending smile as they receive a fruit each or any edible item offerings from the people passing by. For an instant, all of them would put their prayer beads aside and gobble down the offerings in sheer joy. Amid laughter, giggles, chatter and chanting, they would ensure that they don’t miss dragging the beads on the other side. 

Out of many that I have overheard, a conversation between two elderly women was something that caught my attention;

 ‘Oye… Aum Dema mae mena? When have you been here?’ remarked one of the women with a pat on the other’s back.

The other women tilted her head in the direction of the caller, halted for a moment in speculation and muttered, ‘Een wae Aum Sangay. I have been staying with my son and his family here for almost 3 years now. So when and what brings you here?’

‘I came to the capital a couple of months ago to do nothing but babysit my grandchild’, pronounced the rather painful response.

‘I am no better than you. It is my third year of doing the same thing. Besides, this is the only time I get to come out and circumbulate the chorten. I am grounded at the house babysitting until they return from office’.

‘I would rather prefer to live my life at the village. Here, I hardly get time to chant prayers. As you say, this lean hour is my only opportunity. Don’t you think it is quite tiring for us to work hard for the upbringing of our own children, and then follow the same trend for our grandchildren? The time that we should have allotted to spiritual practice do we land up being a babysitter!’

‘I know the fact is harsh but we have to accept the reality. It would be better for us to resort to chant a few prayers than to grunt over this thing. Dusk will sweep in soon’, said Aum Dema with her eyes tinged with a patch of gloominess.

The other nodded and both of their lips assumed the fastest swing in muttering prayers. Looking at the rapidity with which they moved their lips, I could sense their mounting desire to compensate for the lost count on the prayer beads. This is because nothing would define their contentment than a hefty count on their rosary beads at the end of the day.

After a satisfactory count of striding round and round the chorten, many make a clean exit. This would be marked by a momentary halt near the central path leading to the stupa or the gate. Many would clasp their hands into a lotus bud-like form and shut their eyelids in uttering their silent prayers. Others would not dare to do so in front of a crowd or are driven by time.

I often join the crowd and immerse myself in the euphony of religious chanting; the different modes of prayers assuming varying degrees of intonation. I get diffused in the crowd; overwhelmed by the serenity and tranquility prevailing within. 

I cling to the belief that the sole purpose of religion is to gain control over our mind; a path towards self-mastery and liberation.  I can vividly rewind the words of the Principal of Tango monastery at religious discourses during my school days. He reiterated time and again that the sole purpose of religion or the word ‘Choe’ is to gain control over oneself.

 And so have I read in the teachings of the Lord Buddha inscribed in books stating, ‘You cannot find freedom or attain liberation by praying to some gods or making offerings. Practicing awareness in daily life and looking deeply into your own mind lead to cessation of suffering and realization of peace and joy’. I believe that such practice has an inter-linking relationship with spiritual awakening. The serenity and calmness experienced is quite indicative of that. Yet it depends on individual perception which might vary greatly.

A Note to my Love on Valentine Day

 The very first time I heard

Your voice,

There was an aura of gentleness webbed in

Your intonation.

My heart irresistibly melted into continuum

Of tide,

Before I even had the slightest glimpse

Of you,

A part of my daily activities became fastened with your

Gentle tone,

And I caroled with the thrilling rhythm of

Your tones.

The very first time I set eyes on

Your image,

I was inevitably and instinctively glued

To it,

Your picture kept on flickering its

Glamorous glow,

Into the precinct of my conscious core.

The very first day we convened under the

Azure sky,

My inner strength nudged me towards

Our destination.

Days melted into months,

Months clicked into graceful years,

Yet the fragrance of my devotion,

Hasn't drifted an inch from you.

Dear, dip yourself in the pool of

My love,

Gasp the fragrance emanated by the blemish-free bloom of

My lotus,

Knit yourself in the orderly strings of my

Unbound commitment,

Soar yourself into the heavenly firmament of my

Undying love,

And unlock the shower of eternal bliss that

We embrace.

Unfoldment of the Secret

It was the 5^th of December, the day the BCSE results were out. I was busy in the kitchen when my friend called me and remarked, “You scored an aggregate of 75.07%”.

 “Then you?” I instantly threw the query.

“Well, I scored 71.34%”, came the rather low-spirited response.

I could still vividly remember my feelings; the kind of exhilarated world that I was plunged into. A sudden impulse of happiness and triumph flashed through my spines. My face assumed a reddish tinge; a hue triggered by the accelerated flow of blood to my face. But it triggered my tear glands to know that my other colleagues being obliterated from the path that I will be treading despite a fairly good performance.

No sooner people from BBS said they were on their way to my place of dwelling. My mobile phone assumed the peak of its activity, indeed for the first time in my life- pounding in messages and calls from many-known as well as unknown. I shared my views and feelings to BBS, Kuensel and I aired on BBS radio the following night.

It is to be borne in the mind of every individual that success doesn’t come by default. It is a result of deliberate search and well-defined action. If you say success is luck, then I shall reiterate that luck is when preparation meets an opportunity. It is a blemish-free fruit borne by the tree well nurtured or nourished. It is not by chance but by choice. 

However, I regard my success in BCSE 2014 as only a platform; a foundation upon which I can base my career. My real work begins from now and not what I have achieved thus far. I am just done with the preparation of a nursery bed and sowing my viable seed. I have a task as big as that of ensuring all my seeds germinate and peep through the soil, nourish and water it well, protect it from any biotic and abiotic stresses; provide the most congenial conditions for the manifestation of its optimum potentiality; and cater to its need through all the stages of its life.

So in line with the course of action that I have followed, I would like to lay down the following lines;

Read the book, “The Secret of Life” by Rhonda Byrne. It is available as eBook or in pdf version. Suck the nectar that is in store in each page of the book and relish yourself with the very essence of it. To quote a few lines inscribed in this book, “The secret is the law of attraction! Everything that is coming into your life you are attracting into your life. And it is attracted to you by virtue of the images you’re holding in your mind. Whatever is going on in your mind you are attracting to you”.

After all, everything can be summed up and encapsulated in this single line, ‘Thoughts become things’.

It is what we envision daily in our mind that comes into reality. In fact, the title of the RCSC Topper 2014 have I had envisioned daily for almost a year until it came out into concrete reality. It was a latent energy embedded in my subconscious mind that finally manifested to the world outside. It wasn’t by chance or by accident. 

Another thrilling book that would propel you higher in your life is the ‘Master Key System by Charles Haennel’. Read these two books and align yourself with its contents, and take pleasure in reaping the benefits.

I would also recommend the book, ‘Word Power Made Easy’ by Norman Lewis if you want to build up your English Vocabulary in an exciting way. It will also boost up your level of comprehension of each term you lope across. Simply knowing the meaning of a word isn’t enough because it is equally subjected to deletion from the RAM of your brain. So the known word(s) shall be reinforced by integrating and reproducing in your own sentences.

Record your voice on important issues. For instance, I recorded my own voice on the articles of the Constitution of the Kingdom of Bhutan and listened to it until I had it encrypted well down my memory lane. I did the same on so many topics like the MDGs, GHN Pillars, Domains and Indicators and the like. Doing so, you can also notice and reflect on the flaws in your pronunciation or speaking skills.

Watch in YouTube on the topics which are difficult to understand from text and grasp the content presented in the most palatable form in the videos. The Polymerase Chain Reaction, which stipulated quite a hard effort from text, provided a different dimension and an easy methodology in YouTube.

Meditate as frequently as possible- cleansing and refreshing your mind; instilling in your subconscious mind the firm desire or objective to be achieved. Reaffirm in your subconscious mind the goal so that it manifests in reality to the world outside.

Never deceive or be on the pretext to mislead your friends. Often people have the tendency of telling, “I haven’t started to study yet/ why to struggle so much? / I don’t know or don’t have any information regarding this”. You are not going to benefit from this in any way. On the contrary, it is going to kill your moral and inner happiness because the guilt associated with it will do more harm to your intellectual well being than good. Rather, always encourage others to delve deeper and work harder.

It is always better to make your own notes; framing notes in a way that will suit your learning ability and habit. It will also do wonder in saving your time in revising. Arrange notes in a chronological order so that you have it staked in correct order in your brain for easy and faster retrieval when required. So make this habit of note making cling to your learning process like a shadow.

Take tutorial classes only if you feel the need to. Otherwise, it is not necessary especially youth outside Thimphu and the financially constrained ones. Don’t worry if you can’t afford to because I took neither of the PE and main examination tutorial classes. However, I am not ruling out the importance of taking one. Taking it and shedding your own sweat would be an extra boost to your performance.

Nothing to be worried even if you are really weak, need tutorial assistance but don’t have anyone at Thimphu to base your stay. I know many of the graduates struggle to find an accommodation in the capital and they are deprived of some of the educational facilities that city-dwellers enjoy.

If you find it extremely difficult to manage yourself with your distant relatives or village people, leap a step forward to visit the Department of Youth and Sports who will cater to your study needs and provide free accommodation in their hostels. You will also enjoy library facilities offering you reference books and past question papers. In this way, you will be able to perfectly orient yourself towards intensive studies and accordingly the desired result because you will get what you have planted.

The secret ingredient of my triumphant tale have I promulgated here. I shall not let it get desiccated and perish inside myself. Rather, I would gift it onto the coming generations if it is of any sense or significance to them. I shall be enlivened even if a single individual benefits from my course of action. However, it is not to be generalized for every individual will have their own technique or methodology of defining or targeting for success. I only intend to motivate others to define their own course of action for determining their success.

Ashamed to Accompany your Parents? Why..?

Many a times, I heard of incidences where the children are embarrassed to accompany their parents or relatives who hail from the countryside.  Upon questioned by someone, they are on the pretext of saying that the very person next to him/her is someone from his/her village. 

  The most important and the person who deserves all our attention and gratitude turn out to be someone unknown. The hard toiled times where they spent their time paving the path for their children is being rewarded with them being deserted and abandoned when they needed their support the most. There is no point in disguising our family background; instead it is always better to work for elevating it to greater height.  

          

If  narrate an incident in this context; I accompanied my mother to the Imtrat hospital in an attempt to have some light thrown over her health issue of occasional stomach pain and mouth ulcer.

There, I spotted an old man seemingly in his sixties; with red-tinted lips owing to incessant chewing of betel nut; hard, weather-bitten face with a few array of wrinkles adorning it; a faded pant inside his knee-length gho cascading down until his ankle; crack-laden feet crammed into his distorted slipper that might have suffered quite a tremendous pressure for a considerable period of time. 

I instantly followed him sensing that he might be someone in need of help. My guess wasn’t wrong.  Neither was my instinct. There was no one to accompany him. So I offered my service to first understand his medical condition and then translate it to the doctor. For that, I had his medical condition dug; a trailing remnant and a nagging issue that dates back to more than a decade.

He went on remorsefully recounting the several attempts and treatments undergone to recover from the acute itching that his entire body was subjected to over a course of 13 years. The extent to which he suffered was evident from the bruises his brutal yet satiable scratching has led to and the ensuing scars.

I played the role of a mediator; in swaying the medical condition of the old man to the doctor and his suggestions and recommendations in return. I accompanied him to the Injection room, the washroom, the medicine counter and walked with him till Changzamtog. 

On the way, he shared his grievances that it is very difficult for illiterate and old people like him to reel with the pace of the modern world. He planned to go on pilgrimage to Nepal in 2 days but he didn’t get his money exchanged for Rupees. After running to the bank for several times which demanded so many documents, they simply said there is no Rupee when everything was done and ready.

Today, I met this man at the Memorial Chorten. I was glad to learn that he felt relieved after taking the injection and the medicines and could sleep peacefully. He time and again reiterated his gratitude to me; not for relieving his pain but for rather facilitating him. He uttered his prayers and good wishes for me. I was happy myself for being able to make a slight difference in someone else’s life. The very thought enlivens me.

The very fact that he has children in Thimphu but their absence from attending him is a mystery that needs to be illuminated. It is heart-wrenching to witness our senior citizens be in the seclusion of loneliness and hopelessness while the younger generation loiter and hover about in boredom.

       

Life-A Blend of Everything

From sleeping with piles of blankets, to one without any.

From bathing with geyser heated water, to that of naturally heated water of the tropics,

And from cleansing in well set bathroom to one without roof,

From traveling in flight to strolling for miles,

From being a gluttonous eater to an active doer,

From being a commander to a submissive follower,

From being a sponsor to one in debt,

From working in air conditioned room to that of under blazing sun,

From being an empathic to an ignorant listener,

From reading with utmost concentration to that of visual scanning,

From being a vigorous worker to a bed-ridden convalescent,

From being a voracious reader to an awful indolent,

From being a scruffy brat to a pensive grown up woman,

From shedding juvenile tears to counteracting mellowed decision,

From being an ignorant learner to a courteous assimilator.

The times when my life of iron rods rusted, thrashed and transformed shape,

Yet those are the entities that made me malleable, pliable, adjustable or incredibly adaptable.

I have had my foot stepped in an array of bizarre circumstances,

The steps trod an admixture of iridescent rays and distressing downpour,

That’s what defines me and what I am at the moment.